Office by Alex Penny
electric word life, it means forever and that's a mighty long time, but i'm here to tell you there's something else...this blog.
Richard Kern just sent us a mesmerizing little video called Face to Panty Ratio. There’s not a whole lot to say about this one. If you like girls with pretty faces, camel toes, and asses, this is exactly what you need to get you through Thursday morning.
We took the liberty of counting all the panty shots, face shots, and panty/face shots to figure out the ratios in Face to Panty Ratio. Unsurprisingly, the shots of panties (including a shot with a pesky shadow in the lady’s sweet spot that may or may not be straight vaj) came out on top with a healthy 53 shots. Faces clocked in at 41, while faces and panties couldn’t break a measly 11 frames.
Of course, our study was conducted between bites of a turkey hero, which may or may not invalidate the results. Feel free to check our work but, fair warning, there is a good chance Thurston Moore’s music, combined with Kern’s strobe of underwear and faces, could catapult you into a seizure.
Read the rest at Vice Magazine: FACE TO PANTY RATIO - Viceland Today
Adele — Rolling In The Deep (ft. Childish Gambino) (Jamie XX Remix)
where can i get a case o’ these?
My server ambled up to the table as if she were a casual aquantance meeting my dinner companion and me for drinks on her time. I looked over in surprise and greeted her “hello” she replied “do you know what you want to drink?” I knew right from the start the service and impending meal was going to break my heart. She returned with drinks and sighed “do you know what you want to eat?” We told her our order, it fell on deaf ears, my soft tacos were hard tacos, maybe she was trying to tell me something about my decision making skills? Perhaps I was not cool enough to have soft tacos maybe I just hadn’t earned it yet, maybe? Not only were my soft tacos hard but so were my side of $3.50 beans and rice. There were some other issues with happy hour logistics, and dip prices omitted from the menu but I’ll spare you the semantics. I wanted to say something but my meal mate stopped me from expressing my displeasure to the proper authority, hence this note of concern. This dinner disaster went down a week ago which is why i can recall it now with such cool candor as i am seven days removed for the situation. I made a decision to not return to Holy Beans again ever in the future unless i suddenly find myself with an odd desire to be epicuriously abused while eating culturally co-opted food stuff from some kind of a walt disney meets john waters faux baltimore theme neighborhood tourist stop. I think Holy Beans should work on some basic customer service skills for their servers. We are in economic straights right now and I’m not paying for shitty service. If I want to go eat somewhere where the food sucks and the server treats me like an asshole I’ll eat at my grandmothers house…for free.
i went to buy a bus pass at the school store and the two clerks each gave me one. so i tracked down the girl they refused to sell one to in line ahead of me and sold her my extra one for half the price. spending $38 on that stupid earth science lab book is gonna be way less painful now. Oh yeah um this girl is officially the coolest person on the planet. it’s like she’s giving you permission to knock it off and just be yourself from now on.
I have a theory that hipsters will bring back the jerri curl some time between the summer of now and the spring of next year. The mullet is so aught and the high top fade is already wearing out it’s welcome. Everybody on kanye west label will be the first with a jerri, then perez hilton wil rock a jerri, then the jerk kids, at which point it will hit the gay black male community harder than the duck walk…you will wear a jerri wig for Halloween like it’s the dumbest shit ever but you’ll love your jerri so much you will sleep in it and wear it with blue leather pants and white sneakers to art shows and band pratice, activator breaks will be the new cigarette breaks. You’ll have a holster for your “jerri curl juice” and insist everybody call you Leroy or cheryl for the duration of your time spent bewigged. sometimes when your feeling extra gansta you’ll wear an L.A. NOT Oakland Raiders snap back over your greasy curled tresses and call Korean shop owners gooks. happy 20 leven!
O.B. Have you been moisturising?
W.M. Naw dawg, i’m just greased up frum all dis fried chicken.
